My Tribute To A True Friend
This week, I lost a man who was very near and dear to the Baby Boomer and, although I’m speaking in the past tense, he knew how I felt. Each time we were together, even though time passed, in just moments, we fell into a comfort zone like it was as if we saw one another each and every day.
Over my 72 years of life, both personally and professionally, I have had the opportunity to meet and become acquainted with thousands of people, however, only a very few are considered to be my friends and even fewer would be a true friend. Mike, to whom we said good-bye to yesterday, is one of the fewer and this is my tribute to a true friend.
Please let me tell you how difficult it is to write this as an attempt to experience some closure knowing that Mike may be gone, but will live forever and thought of often, by me, as I’m sure the same will hold true for those who may read this and ever knew him.
I first came to know Mike in 1982, 42 years ago, when I was a “brand-spanking” new General Manager (GM) at Giant Food. We had monthly manager meetings and my first encounter with Mike was at the monthly meeting as we were both in the same district. A veteran GM, Mike was gracious enough to come over and formally introduce himself although I already knew who he was. Right away, I knew this was a man I could trust and he “opened the door” by inviting me to call him anytime when I may have a question or concern.
Soon after, I began calling Mike on almost a daily basis. Our stores were both in Alexandria, mine in Old Town (#24) and his in the Bradlee Shopping Center (#35) and due to the close proximity to one another, we often met for lunch. These experiences were instrumental in my development as I was a sponge soaking up all the knowledge I could from his wisdom which I firmly believe led me to my later workplace successes.
Over the next six years, I was able to see Mike put into practice all that he had unselfishly shared with me and it was like magic. Mike was rather quiet, very reserved, and private being what I might term a loner. At the same time, he was a true leader who was the owner of the necessary leadership skills which few I’ve ever come into contact with possess. Mike was always cool, calm, and collected never angered to the point where he would raise his voice, belittle anyone, or use unbecoming language. Mike was an excellent communicator who didn’t take an hour to handle a situation which should only take five minutes as he was concise, somewhat blunt, and to the point. He had a way of getting his point across without it offending you, but you knew he meant business–never asking anything from anyone that he hadn’t or wouldn’t do himself as he worked “with” his people rather than his people working “for” him. He fully supported those he worked “with” giving them all the credit and none of the blame–Mike took all the blame. These traits led to his being extremely well-respected and respect which was not demanded, but earned. Mike always met confrontation head on and held those he worked “with” accountable both in praising them and disciplining them when necessary. Mike’s associates were very loyal to him and would follow him to the end no matter what.
We both left Giant in 1988 moving to Greenville, SC working with the Bi-Lo Supermarket chain and our friendship continued to grow as our young families got together often. Mike’s wife, Verda and La Bear became fast friends enjoying each other’s company and being able to laugh at the antics of their husbands. This friendship between La Bear and Verda has also been long-lasting. As Mike’s health worsened these last years, Verda was always by his side doing everything she could to take care of him and make him as comfortable as possible–a true angel committed to upholding her marriage vows for 54 years.
An Army veteran who served in Vietnam, Mike was one who would never talk about that experience. If that conversation somehow came up, he quickly changed the subject unwilling to share, that is, until the last few years when he opened up to a point and regularly visited with his comrades from Vietnam. Mike loved his country, was a true patriot, and a defender of the flag.
Mike was an extremely strong man having endured both the good times and the challenging times life presents. He experienced successes and failures, unbearable tragedy with the loss of a son and a grandson. As the poem, “I Wish You Enough”, by Bob Perks, which I refer to often states, Mike lived through enough sun, enough rain, enough happiness, enough pain, enough gain, enough loss, and enough “hellos” to get you through the final “good-bye”. But Mike was a fighter and he never quit–never! If he was knocked down, he would get up and continuing to do so until he prevailed and prevail he did. Yes, he was the patriarch of his family, which he so loved and in return so loved him, being his everything which he was so proud of. Mike is leaving quite a legacy with Verda, a son, two daughters, a daughter-in-law, fourteen grandchildren, two great-grandchildren, and countless other family members and friends to whom he was of counsel to–right, wrong, or indifferent.
Recalling another poem, “The Dash”, by Linda Ellis, and quoting “For it matters not, how much we own, the cars…the house…the cash. What matters is how we live and love and how we spend our dash.” Mike was born on the Baby Boomer’s and La Bear’s wedding day, July 28th, 1944———————-and passed on August 11th, 2024. Please note the length of Mike’s “dash”. Mike was a good man, lived a life well-lived, and should be proud of the way he spent his incredible “dash”!!
I’ll always treasure the times we were able to hug one another and express our love, yet so sorry we’ll miss having that opportunity again here on Planet Earth. Thank you, Mike, for all that you taught me and for all the years of eternal friendship as this is my tribute to YOU–my true friend!
